Stop Worry Now

worried woman with hands over faceWorry.  People use that word to mean many different things. Some people only seem to worry when something truly is amiss.  Other people worry about things that are unlikely to ever happen.  There have been many studies about the negative effects of worry on our health.

Cover Image of Tap It Away: 10 Minutes to Freedom With EFT by Dr. Leanna ManuelMake no mistake about it, worry is a destructive force but it can be stopped.  Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) has been the mainstay for many mental health professionals when treating worry.  I have used to too.  However, I find that combining CBT with meridian tapping (EFT) is even more effective. There are examples of how to use meridian tapping to stop worry and anxiety in my book Tap It Away: 10 Minutes to Freedom With EFT.

Below is an example you can use whenever worry appears in your life.  (New to Tapping?  Click HERE for a brief explanation and video.)

Step 1: Name what you are worried about, then insert your worry in the blank.

Step 2: Tap on your karate chop point and repeat these statements. “even though illustration for karate chop pointI am worried about _________, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Even though I am worried about ________, I choose to feel confident no matter what.  Even though I am worried about ________, I love and accept myself and all of my feelings.

Step 3: Tap on the points while using the recommended reminder phrases.

diagram of the tapping pointsEyebrow…I am worried about _____

Side of Eye…This worry about _____

Under the Eye…I am worried about _____

Under the Nose…This worry about _____

Chin…I’m so worried about _____

Collarbone…Even though I am worried about _____

Under the Arm…I choose to face it with calm confidence

Top of Head…Even though I am worried about _____

Eyebrow…I won’t let that worry stop me from the things I want to do

Side of Eye…Even though I have worried about _____ in the past

Under the Eye…I choose to react based on the present situation, not the past

Under the Nose…I have worried about _____

Chin…But I choose to think about how well I can handle so many different things

Collarbone…Even though I have worried about _____

Under the Arm…I choose thoughts that are confident

Top of Head…I experience feelings that are calm and happy

 

Taker a deep breath and let it out.  Continue tapping with these or similar reminder phrases until your worry has subsided.

Jump Ship

Ha!  I just caught the fact that my book review of Jump Ship that I mentioned in a previous post somehow never got published.  Sorry about that.

Jump Ship by Josh Shipp book coverBefore anyone gets antsy, let me say up front that I’m not planning to quit my job and start another career in the near future.  I received Jump Ship by Josh Shipp a few years ago in a goodreads.com giveaway and initially requested it simply because I am fascinated by the process of personal growth.  I may actually be addicted to personal growth and self-help books. I currently have an interest in turning my passion into a profession for my retirement years so it certainly couldn’t hurt to read the book.

I loved this book for several reasons. First, I loved the writer’s open and honest style. It was informative. It was challenging. It was provocative. It was personal. On the first page of the introduction the author stated that he has a reputation for being “in your face, but on your side” and that was evident throughout the text. I can appreciate that style.  It is the same style that has worked for me while doing psychotherapy over the years. It is not a style that works for everybody, but it worked for me most of the time.

The second reason that I loved this book was because it was practical. There were no easy answers but there were actual things to do to help you to discern what your passion is and things to do to evaluate whether you could actually make it profitable.

Third, it is a rags to riches kind of story.  Who doesn’t appreciate that? The author obviously has practiced what he preaches.  I have a lot of respect for that. In addition, there were numerous stories of other individuals who have also undergone the process, not just the high points, but also the down and dirty, nitty gritty low points as well.

I would recommend this book for anyone who is considering changing careers, feeling burned out with the status quo, or who is in any way dissatisfied with an aspect of their life. There is much broader applicability to the information in this book than just humping ship from a less fulfilling job. With a little creativity you could make a new life with this information, not just get a new job.

Letting It Be Easy

links of chain making things difficultDo you make things harder than they have to be?  I know that I sometimes do.  There have been many occasions when I’ve struggled through a task, and on completion been amazed (and distressed) when I realize that it could have been much simpler or easier than I made it.  Perhaps it is prior programming that taught me that things worth having require work, or maybe it is the number of past experiences when change was truly difficult. I suspect that I have just been getting in my own way much of the time.  This tapping video is about letting things be easier whenever that is possible and at least not making them needlessly difficult.

I’d Rather Be Them

Want to Be ThemI don’t think I’m alone on this.  Sometimes it looks like everyone else’s life looks like it is going much better than my own.  I catch my self thinking “I’d rather be them” instead of embracing being me.  If this is ever true for you, tap along.

illustration for karate chop pointSetup (while tapping the karate chop point): Even though I often think that I’d rather be them instead of me, I am open to learning to accept being me. Even though I often long to be someone other than who I am, I am eager to learn to love and accept myself more completely.  Even though being someone else seems to be quite alluring at times, there is another part of me that likes who I am.  I am open to getting more in touch with that part of myself on a regular basis.

diagram of the tapping pointsEyebrow…I’d rather be them instead of me

Side of Eye…This is another manifestation of the grass is always greener

Under the Eye…Even though I know the fallacy of that type of thinking it still creeps into my consciousness

Under Nose…When I want to be someone else I’m really rejecting me

Chin…How can I expect other people to accept me when I don’t accept myself?

Collarbone…When I want to be someone else it sometimes means that I just want to hide from my own problems and challenges

Under the Arm…Other times it means that I’m buying into the myth that other people don’t have the problems I have

Top of Head…While I know that is false, it is easy to fall into the trap since I don’t see their problems

Eyebrow…I only feel my own

Side of Eye…When all of my longing to be someone else or live someone else’s life is over

Under Eye…I’m still left with whatever it is that I need to deal with

Under the Nose…The energy of wishing and longing for someone else’s life is wasted

Chin…It would be better spent trying to be the best me I know how to be

Collarbone…That’s the advice I always give to others

Under the Arm…Be the best you that you know how to be

Top of Head…In every second, minute, hour, and day

Eyebrow…That’s the message I often need to hear too

Side of Eye…Be the best me

Under the Eye…During the good times and during the bad times

Under the Nose… Not trying to be perfect

Chin…I don’t really want to be someone else

Collarbone…But sometimes I’m materialistic and just want the things they have

Under the Arm…I don’t want to be them

Top of Head…I want to learn to be the best me I can possible be.  Because I am enough.

Finding The Right Time

Book cover of Tao Te Ching: The Definitive Edition by Lao Tzu from amazon.com

I often find it hard to know when it is time to take action versus time to wait.  When exactly is the right time? This tapping video was inspired by portions of the Tao Te Ching, Verse 8.

When acting, remember – timing is everything

One who lives in accordance with nature

does not go against the way of things

He moves in harmony with the present moment

always knowing the truth of just what to do.

My Cravings Always Win

book cover for Don't Diet Reprogramming Your Weight With Meridian TappingThe tapping exercise below is from Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping.  Cravings are something that I continue to struggle with.  It seems to be a problem for many people I know.

illustration for karate chop pointSetup (while tapping on the karate chop point) – Even though it seems like my cravings always win, I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway. Even though is seems like my cravings always win, I choose to continue to try. My cravings are a part of me, and I accept myself.

diagram of the tapping pointsEyebrow…My cravings always win

Side of Eye…So it doesn’t seem worth it to even try

Under the Eye…I might as well just go ahead and eat it

Nose…If I fight it and then lose, I just end up feeling worse

Chin…Even though it seems that my cravings always win

Collarbone…I know that it isn’t really true

Under the Arm…Sometimes I am able to resist

Top of Head…I am open to learning about what makes me more successful during those times

Eyebrow…And less successful at others

Side of Eye…My cravings don’t always win

Under the Eye…My cravings sometimes win

Nose…In reality my cravings aren’t against me

Chin…They are a part of me

Collarbone…My cravings are a signal that something needs my attention

Under the Arm…I can choose to deal with it without food

Top of Head…I can choose to continue toward my goals

Eyebrow…It would be helpful to stop seeing this as a battle

Side of Eye…Its not a battle with winners and losers

Under the Eye…I am open to knowing what it is that needs my attention

Nose…I choose to treat myself with more compassion when I’m faced with cravings

Chin…So that I have the energy to address whatever it is that is behind this feeling

Collarbone…That’s it.  Cravings are just another feeling

Under the Arm…A feeling in disguise

Top of Head…And I am open to feeling it.

What Do You Believe You Are Capable Of?

Jump Ship by Josh Shipp book coverYou may have already read my book review of Jump Ship by Josh Shipp. As I mentioned in that review, the book offers much more than guidance for changing careers. There are many gems hidden in the pages that have potential for profound life-changing “ah ha” moments.  One of them is this question, “What do you believe you are capable of?”

Those 8 words stopped me in my tracks. I re-read them several times.  What do I believe I am capable of? It sounds like a lot of ego, but I have always believed I was capable of great things. There has always been a burning desire to do something big, something that mattered, something remarkable. I honestly don’t know where that came from. I don’t remember being told that I could do something important. Actually, I remember being told from a variety of sources that I wasn’t anything special.  There were those warnings that “pride goeth before a fall”, that I was acting “too big for my britches”, and many other quaint but powerful statements that suggest that “I am not all that.”

I heard them. Believe me, I definitely heard them. And there were times that I didn’t attempt something because I also, on some level, believed them.  Little things, like not being one of the senior superlatives in high school also caused me to question and doubt.  There were many comments and experiences to help balance some of this out. I received many accolades for being smart. My musical spark that never goes outtalent was almost always praised. And boy could I water ski for such a little kid. So while there were individual ups and downs in my confidence level at certain points in my life, that tiny little spark never went out.

It was that tiny spark that has allowed me to continue pushing through the tough times and continue striving for something better. So what do I believe I am capable of? I’m still not sure. Words like “anything” and “almost anything” come to mind but are quickly silenced by the doubts of other people that still ring in my ears. So, I chose to revise the question to “what do I want to be capable of?” That seemed like an easier place to start. In the context of Jump Ship I want to be capable of making a living as an author.

Next in the Jump Ship process is the internal review process. OK, so I want it – but do I BELIEVE IT? That is TBD. After writing and publishing the last two books I have discovered just how much is really involved in becoming an author. It isn’t as simple as just writing some pages of text and voila, you are an author.  My third book has been sitting in the wings, almost complete for more than two years. On my white board over my desk I have written “Authors Must Write” in big bold letters to remind me what I must do to accomplish this.

So my expanded  set of questions includes, “Am I capable of coming up with the ideas, capable of editing, capable of promoting, able to tolerate rejection, and all of the other things that go along with it?”  So far I’ve found that I am certainly better prepared for some of these tasks than others, and I enjoy doing some of these tasks much more than I enjoy others.

I do believe Josh Shipp’s premise that you have to BELIEVE in order to really ACHIEVE your dreams.  So what about you?  What do you believe you are capable of?

Potato Chips

Open Bag of Potato ChipsVegetable chips are good for you, right? Well they were probably better for me than potato chips.  I still ate too many of them and I ate them too late at night to be good for me.  I didn’t feel very good about that so I decided to tap.  Here is what I came up with.  If you have suggestions for improvement, let me know.

Setup (while tapping karate chop point). Tonight my problem was potato chips. illustration for karate chop point At least they weren’t regular potato chips.  These were fancy vegetable chips.  While I’d like to feel better about that, the truth is that I ate too much.  Too many calories.  Too late at night. I wish I had more control over my snacking.  And tonight my problem was potato chips.  In spite of this, I choose to love and accept myself anyway.  Even though I ate more than I think is good for me, I choose to honor and accept myself.  Even though my eating feels like it was out of control, I deeply and complete love, respect, and accept myself.

 

Eyebrow…I ate potato chips tonightdiagram of the tapping points

Side of Eye…I didn’t measure them

Under the Eye…I ate too many of them

Nose…That makes me feel bad

Chin…Physically and mentally

Collarbone…I wish I had more control over my eating

Under the Arm…Really, I wish I didn’t need to control my eating at all

Top of Head…I’d like to eat whatever I want, whenever I want it

Eyebrow…But that isn’t the reality of my body and my metabolism

Side of Eye…I am open to understanding more about why I continue to overeat

Under the Eye…I am open to learning to tap before eating any snack foods

Nose…I’d rather deal with whatever I’m trying to “feed”

Chin…Instead of hurting my body

Collarbone…I can change this pattern one bite at a time

Under the Arm…I have the tools

Top of Head…Now I just need to use them

Too Judgmental

LighteningLike most things, making quick judgements about people, places, and situations has both an upside and a downside.  Sometimes these quick judgments can save your life.  Other times the quick judgments  have the negative connotation of  being too judgmental.  I confess that I often fall into this latter category making judments at lightening speed.   Tap along with the video to experience  meridian tapping as it is used to diminish the downside of this personality trait.