Serving Others – Tapping Inspired by the Tao Te Ching

Does serving others seem like a good idea, but when it is time to actually do it you feel resistance?  The following tapping exercise is designed to help you begin to address any resistance you might feel.

Say these words while tapping on the karate chop point: When I think about serving others I get a little uncomfortable. The word “serve” really sticks in my throat.  I think of slavery, oppression, and ownership. I sometimes enjoy doing things for other people, but a resist if I feel I must.  I am choosing to tap now for more clarity about my resistance.  I am choosing to learn more about my motivations.  I am choosing to love and accept myself on this journey.

Eyebrow…The importance of serving others is something I’ve grown up with

Side of Eye…But I’ve also grown up with the concept of being used by others.

Under the Eye…That gets a little muddy in my head sometimes.

Under the Nose…I can’t even say that my motives are always altruistic when I am doing things for other people.

Chin…If I want them to feel gratitude am I really serving?

Collarbone…I don’t know.

Under the Arm…If I want them to remember what I’ve done for them am I really serving?

Top of Head…I don’t know.

Eyebrow…The motive seems to be more important that the action in this one.

Side of Eye…If that is the case, I have a long way to go.

Under the Eye…My behavior is much more in line with service than is my attitude.

Under the Nose…I do care about other people.

Chin…I’m not completely narcissistic and selfish.

Collarbone…I get pleasure from helping others.

Under the Arm…But if I’m getting pleasure from it am I really serving?

Top of Head…Do I have to be miserable to serve?

Eyebrow…Do I have to suffer to serve?

Side of Eye…Many of the great “servants” that I’ve been told about

Under the Eye…Had lots of bad things happen to them.

Under the Nose…I don’t really want that.

Chin…I don’t think this is something that I’m going to get the answer to.

Collarbone…I think this is one of those things where it is the journey that is important.

Under the Arm…I usually hate those.

Top of Head…I’d like some more guidelines please.

Eyebrow…How much service is enough?

Side of Eye…Can two acts of service balance out an afternoon of self-indulgence?

Under the Eye…I’m not totally serious about that, but I’m not totally kidding either.

Under the Nose…I want to get a little bit more comfortable with the idea.

Chin…I’d like to recognize more opportunities for service.

Collarbone…I’d like to think of others more often than I do now.

Under the Arm…I guess that is progress.

Top of Head…I choose to remain open to more clarity and understanding about serving others.

Take a deep breath and let it out slowly.  Notice how you feel.  Were there questions that popped into your mind?  Were there moments of clarity?  Write them down.  They could be inspiration for more tapping later.

Tapping Exercise – Feeling Overwhelmed

Its embarrassing to admit this, but sometimes I feel so overwhelmed that I forget to tap.  I hate it when I suddenly, after way too much angst, think about tapping.  Here is a short tapping exercise to get you started when you find yourself doing the same thing.

Say this statement aloud, “I feel overwhelmed.”  Rate the intensity or truth of the statement on a 0-10 scale where 10 is very true.  Write the number down for later.

Repeat this setup statement three times while tapping on the karate chop point.  “Even though I feel overwhelmed right now, and that’s my excuse for not tapping, I deeply and completely love and accept myself and all of my feelings — even my excuses.

Begin tapping, using a different reminder phrase at each of the tapping points.

Eyebrow…I feel overwhelmed

Side of Eye…So I can’t tap

Under the Eye…I feel overwhelmed

Under the Nose…I feel so overhwhelmed that I can’t even do anything

Chin…I can’t even tap because I’m so overwhelmed

Collarbone…I feel overwhelmed

Under the Arm…I AM overwhelmed

Top of Head…You would be too if you were me

Eyebrow…I have good reasons to feel overwhelmed

Side of Eye…I am overwhelmed

Under the Eye…So it’s okay if I’m stuck

Under the Nose…Well, maybe its not ok with me

Chin…Tapping is pretty easy

Collarbone…I could probably tap, even though I’m so overwhelmed

Under the Arm…And I feel pretty good after I tap

Top of Head…It just might work

 

Take a deep breath and say the original statement again, “I feel overwhelmed.”  Rate it on the 0-10 scale.  Was there any change?  If your new rating is above a 3, continue tapping with the statements above or use your own words about what you are feeling until the intensity or truth of the statement comes down.

Tapping Exercise – Head in the Sand

Do you have a tendency to bury your head in the sand and try to ignore problems?  If so, this tapping exercise from my upcoming book Unleash Your Primal Power: Totem Tapping for Health and Happiness might be just what you need to get started on a path of managing things more directly.

Begin tapping on the karate chop spot and use these words as your setup:  Even though I would rather play the ostrich and stick my head in the sand, I deeply love and accept myself.  Even though it feels like it would be easier to ignore my problems and hope they will go away on their own, I love, accept, and forgive myself.  Even though I would prefer not to see the problem so that I don’t have to do anything about it, I accept the reality of my situation and accept all of me.

Eyebrow…Playing ostrich

Side of Eye…Sticking my head in the sand

Under the Eye…Playing ostrich

Nose…Ignoring my problems

Chin…Playing ostrich

Collarbone…Hoping these problems will magically disappear

Under the Arm…Playing ostrich

Top of Head…I don’t really want to deal with this

Eyebrow…Playing ostrich

Side of Eye…I know it doesn’t really work

Under the Eye…Playing ostrich

Nose…I have to pull my head out of the sand sometime

Chin…Playing ostrich

Collarbone…I might as well face it

Under the Arm…Playing ostrich

Top of Head…I can do it now

Take a deep breath and let it out.  Notice what you feel.  You are likely to need to repeat this several times or add your own words about playing ostrich and how it has shown up in your life.  Drop me a comment and let me know how it worked for you.

Happy Tapping.

Tapping: Changing Problems into Possibilities

falling tree bramchesI like tapping. No, I love tapping. It often baffles me that people are so resistant to trying it. Excuses are numerous, but one that used to ring true to me was “Tapping can’t change anything. The problem is still there.”  Maybe yes, but maybe no.

Let’s say that you are traveling along the road when you come upon a tree that is down and blocking yor path.  You are right that tapping is not going to make the tree go away for you.  It will still be there after you are done tapping. So what is the point of doing tapping in this situation?

Most people experience some degree of upset or frustration when their plans must be altered suddenly. The word “detour” often has negative emotions attached to it.  Tapping could be used immediately to decrease the frustration or negative feelings that arose when you first saw that the path was blocked.  Tapping could also be used for the automatic negative thoughts that because evident such as “Now, I’ll be late” or “I’ll never get there”, or “I’ll be stranded out here forever.”  This type of negative thinking is seldom productive and, in fact, blocks our ability to creatively problem-solve and move forward.

There may be enough room to go around the tree. You might be able to back up, turn around, or go another route. The blocked path could be a gift because an even bigger obstacle or danger is around the next turn. If your energy system is all messed up you might miss the opportunity to feel thankful that you didn’t end up in an even bigger disaster.

Bottom line….you are absolutely right.  The tree is still there. But your perception of the tree and the total situation can change dramatically with the use of tapping.  The relief will be obvious.  Happy tapping.

Using Tapping for Sleep

Cat SleepYou would think that I would immediately think of tapping whenever I have a challenge.  I really wish that were true. I would suffer so much less that way. But, like many people, I go about trying to solve my problems in the “usual” way first.  I have had some trouble sleeping at night. The way I was thinking about the problem suggested at least three things were interfering with my sleep. First there was a temperature problem. My bedroom was way too hot.  In fact, my house was too hot. Temperatres during the day had started getting into the 90s and my house was turning into a little oven. I don’t sleep well if I’m not in a cool room.

A second issue was a frequen cough and plugged up sinuses. I have been sick recenty and my respiratory system doesn’t particularly like the climate here in New Mexico. Open windows and doors, heat, and blowing fans weren’t helping my dryness problem. I would start to fall asleep and then awaken when I started coughing.

The third issue that I identified was emotional. I was angry and frustrated about the swamp cooler, the dryness, and the illness. Thoughts like “if people were just competent I wouldn’t have to suffer” (waiting on repairs for the swamp cooler), “I wouldn’t have to deal with this if I were back in Ohio”, and “if I don’t get some sleep soon it is really going to get ugly” were prominent.  To add insult to injury, at the time I was spending a majority of my day helping other people overcome their insomnia. I was angry that I might have to resort to using those techniques for myself and I didn’t want to. (My inner 2-year-old was definitely in control.)

So there I was…awake, miserable, and angry. It was almost like one of those cartoon lightbulbs lit up over my head.  So I started tapping.  At first I wasn’t sure what I was tapping about.  I just knew that I was miserable and that I wanted it to stop. Then I focused on feeling hot.  After I had tapped a few rounds about that I started tapping about my lungs settling down.  I tapped while I focused on my rising panic about not sleeping.  I also tapped about how angry and frustrated I was with the whole situation. I even threw in some tapping about feeling stupid because I didn’t think of tapping sooner.

All of that tapping souncds like a lot, but in reality it probably only took about 10 minutes until I was calm, relaxed, and comfortable enough to fall asleep. There are a few lessons here that I feel are important to highlight,

1.  I just started tapping.  I didn’t need clarity about what I was tapping for in order to get started.

2.  I didn’t do any real setup statements or formal reminder phrases. I didn’t need them.  My body, mind, and spirit knew exactly what I needed in the moment.

3.  I had to stick with it for a little while in order to get results.

4.  It worked.

 

Happy Tapping.