Photo of Dr Leanna Manuel

I Can’t Adult Today

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There is a lot to unpack in that statement. Say it aloud, “I can’t adult today.” Lets start with I can’t. That is probably inaccurate. At least in my case, the more accurate statement would be either I choose not to or I would prefer not to.

I Can't Adult Today signage

Then, there is the word adult. What does that mean anyway? A dictionary definition is …having attained full size and strength. While that could be debated based on my height, I’m as tall and strong as I’ll probably ever be again. An alternate definition is mature. Wow! Mature can mean fully developed physically or showing the mental and emotional qualities of an adult. This is another fuzzy definition. When I consider the original phrase I can’t adult today it is the second definition that most likely applies. I interpret this to mean that I don’t want to exhibit the amount of wisdom, intellect, and emotional control I would expect from an adult.

The statement then could read…I would prefer not to make decisions, think through problems, face challenges, or regulate my emotions.

Today. The implication is that this is a time-limited problem. I might be ok doing it tomorrow, next week, or next year. This is somewhat hopeful but might be better expressed as….in this moment and under these circumstances.

Put it all together:

I choose not to make decisions, think through problems, face challenges, or regulate my emotions in this moment and under these circumstances.

This has a totally different feel to it, doesn’t it?


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