I Don’t Know How To Stop Eating

To say that I don’t know how to stop eating may sound really strange…to anybody that hasn’t experienced before. I can fast. I can restrict my eating to mealtime. But I can’t seem to stop once I’ve started. This is the hallmark of many different “addictive behaviors” which is why abstinence is such a useful strategy. But here’s the rub…you can’t just abstain from eating.

illustration for karate chop point

Setup: I don’t seem to know how to stop eating. I can have a healthy plan but once I start eating I usually eat too much. I don’t understand why I can’t just eat a small amount. Leaving food on my plate makes me feel anxious. Leaving food in the saucepan or skillet makes me feel anxious too. I’d like to be able to eat a reasonable portion and then just be done. In spite of all of these frustrations, I choose to love and accept myself anyway.

diagram of the tapping points

Eyebrow…I can’t stop eating once I start

Side of Eye…I tend to overeat at every meal

Under the Eye…I just can’t seem to get enough

Under the Nose…Enough what? I don’t know

Chin…I would be lying if I said I was hungry

Collarbone…I rarely eat to stop hunger

Under the Arm…I don’t usually get hungry

Top of Head…I eat too much food to really feel hungry

Eyebrow…So why can’t I stop eating?

Side of Eye…I plan my meals

Under the Eye…I plan nutritious food

Under the Nose…And then once I start eating I can’t seem to stop

Chin…Even though I can’t seem to stop eating once I start

Collarbone…I choose to eat according to my plan anyway

Under the Arm…Even though leaving food on my plate makes me feel anxious

Top of Head…I choose to leave food on my plate anyway

Eyebrow…Even though leaving food in the kitchen makes me feel anxious

Side of Eye…I choose to leave food in the kitchen anyway

Under the Eye…Even though I feel anxious when I don’t finish all of the food

Under the Nose…I choose to eat in a healthy way

Chin…All of this food anxiety

Collarbone…I am open to clarity about these confusing feelings

Under the Arm…Food anxiety

Top of Head…I am open to loving myself in spite of all of this confusion

This is a great tapping to do BEFORE you begin eating. It will help to take the edge off of the compulsion to overeat. There are obviously other strategies that can help as well such as having limited food available, putting away the anticipated leftovers before beginning the meal, etc. but if you don’t deal with the underlying problem, most people will just find another way to self-sabotage. Going through the tapping helps to rearrange the energy of your body and can help you get to the bottom of the issue.

This tapping, and more like it can be found in Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping.

book cover for Don't Diet Reprogramming Your Weight With Meridian Tapping

I Will Feel Deprived

Who likes the feeling of deprivation?  I certainly don’t.  Dread related to feeling deprived can stop people from making positive changes in their diet, particularly if they currently partake in something known to be less than healthy or even dangerous.  Today’s tapping is short, but is a starting place for addressing the fear of deprivation.

Say this statement aloud, “I will feel deprived if I cannot eat my favorite foods.”  How true does that feel to you?  Rate it on the 0-10 scale (10=is very strong or very true.)

illustration for karate chop point

Setup (Karate Chop Point): Even though I am afraid of how I will feel if I don’t eat my favorite foods. I choose to love and accept myself anyway. Even though I am sure I will feel deprived without my favorite foods, I am hopeful that I can find other sources of pleasure in my life.  Even though the fear of deprivation is very strong for me, I am beginning to consider small diet changes that will help me to be healthy and happy.

diagram of the tapping points

Eyebrow…I feel deprived

Side of Eye…I want to eat my favorite foods

Under the Eye…I don’t want to feel deprived

Under the Nose…I need to eat or I will feel deprived

Chin…I will do anything to avoid that feeling

Collarbone…This deprivation

Under the Arm…Fear of deprivation

Top of Head…This strong feeling of deprivation

Say the original statement again, “I will feel deprived if I cannot eat my favorite foods?”  How true does that feel to you now?  Did specific foods pop in your mind?  Continue tapping about how it would feel to not eat those foods or to eat them less often.  Did your mind drift to specific thoughts, feelings, or sensations related to deprivation?  Continue tapping about how much you want to avoid those thoughts, feelings, and sensations. 

Remember you can find these and other tapping exercises to assist in your health and wellness in Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping

Questions or suggestions?  I’d love to hear from you.

book cover for Don't Diet Reprogramming Your Weight With Meridian Tapping

They Had Bread

This is a very old article (at least 7 years) but when I found it today it made me so happy that I decided to re-post.

Bilmore EstateIt is hard to believe how much excitement I felt as a result of the opportunity to have bread with my meal.  For those of you who don’t know, I have been living gluten-free for about a year now.  While I never “cheat” on purpose, eating out in restaurants is always a gamble for me.

 

 

Last week I had lunch with my son and his fiance at the Biltmore Estate in North Carolina.  While the website said there were gluten-free options, and I had consumed a magnificent meal there on Thanksgiving, I still expected to have very limited choices.  I looked longingly at the regular menu and then let our server know that I would need gluten-free options.  She said she would be right back with a gluten-free menu.  One star for that?

varieties of breadThe gluten-free menu was in my hands within a few minutes and I was thrilled to see that almost everything on the regular menu was also available to me.  I could have the herbed chicken or the barbecue.  I was so excited.  Two Stars!!  Then she said that if I wanted one of the sandwiches from the regular menu just to know and they would put it on gluten-free bread for me.  Gluten free bread?  I don’t think I have been to a restaurant yet that actually had gluten-free bread.  Four Stars!!.  I actually chose a meal that did not include bread, but just knowing that I had the option was amazing.

I chose to split a sampler platter for two with my son.  He wanted to substitute french fried for the collard greens.  The server said that the substitution would be fine, but cautioned that the fries would be cooked in the same oil as gluten foods so would not be safe.  We got them on a separate plate so my food wouldn’t be contaminated and he was quite happy.  Five Stars!!!  A server who really got it.

After lunch we were interested in dessert, because it would be yummy and because I had a buy one get one free coupon.  Alas, none of the desserts looked to be gluten-free.  Once again, my server saved the day, checked with the kitchen, and brought me the most delicious chocolate pudding I think I have ever had.  Can I give Six Stars?

For the first time since starting this gluten-free adventure I felt like I had a dining experience that was equal to every one else.  Thank you Biltmore Stable Cafe for making me feel welcome and NORMAL.

 

Since the time of the first publication of this article there seems to be an increased awareness of gluten-free eating, but it still is usually treated as a preference rather than a necessity and many restaurants offer one or two possibilities rather than a full menu.  Whenever I go out to eat (which is rare) and encounter a restaurant that can work with my food issues (more than just gluten) I am again filled with the same sense of wonder, awe, and gratitude that I experienced that day at Biltmore.

Breaking the Rules

breaking the rules with a plate of pastaToday I broke the rules.  Some people might not think that this is too serious.  I didn’t break any laws.  I didn’t cheat at any games.  I ate pasta for dinner.  I’m sure it doesn’t seem like much to you, but to me it is quite disappointing.  When it comes to my food, I don’t like breaking the rules.

Rule #1.  Don’t eat when you aren’t hungry.  I had a snack earlier.  I drove toward town and stopped at my favorite Italian restaurant and ordered gluten free pasta.  Its a great place where they really understand my allergies and cook off-menu for me.  My motivation…I was tired of eating salad, felt frazzled from work, and just wanted some relief.

Rule #2. Don’t eat any starchy carbs after 5 pm.  I know that eating late in the evening is bad for me, so I load most of my calories before 5, and try to eat raw fruit and veggies in the evening if I’m hungry.  This was definitely a plate of starchy carbs, and there were very few vegetables involved.

glass of water to keep you from breaking the rulesRule #3. Drink a full glass of water before eating meals.  I didn’t drink any water at all, and none before the meal.  I already know that thirst wasn’t what was driving my behavior, but it might have helped me to slow down.  If there had been a video camera on me I bet I would have seen myself actually shoveling the food in.

Rule #4. Use tapping before eating anything that isn’t on my meal plan.  I want to know that I’ve dealt with my emotional baggage BEFORE reaching for food.  No tapping before this meal.

These aren’t rules given to me by anyone else.  These were my own rules and I couldn’t – or wouldn’t – follow them.  Luckily I get a redo tomorrow.  I’m not going to spend a lot of time beating myself up for it.  One meal of pasta isn’t a disaster but I do know that it is sometimes hard for me to get back on track after starchy carbs.

Here are the tapping topics I see in my very near future:

  1. stress eating
  2. resistance to following my plan
  3. using food for emotions instead of eating for fuel
  4. forgiveness for being an imperfect human

How about you?  Did you have challenges with food today?  Did you stumble or overcome them?  Did you tap?

Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping

Diets don’t typically work. Anyone who has ever been on a diet knows that traditional dieting works for only a short time then — BOOM — the weight comes back on.  In order to achieve safe, effective, and lasting weight loss it is necessary to restore the body’s balance and to address the reasons why the weight is there in the first place.

Meridian tapping is the perfect technique for getting to the root cause of weight gain.  It is also an effective technique for decreasing resistance to exercise, eliminating cravings, and restoring rational thought related to food and nutrition.

My book, Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping gives you a complete program to address many common issues associated with overeating, poor eating, avoidance of exercise, and irrational beliefs about food.  In addition, by working through the exercises in the book you will develop the tapping skills to fine-tune and tailor the tapping to your individual concerns.

Lea’s Rules – Avoid Corn

Picture of fresh corn with husk pulled back exposing the beautiful yellow kernelsAnyone who knows me very well knows that I need to avoid many common food items because they make me very sick.  It is not a casual “I think I’ll stop eating snails” kind of thing.  Perhaps the hardest for me has been corn.  Sure I like the taste of corn bread, corn on the cob, and creamed corn.  Giving it up isn’t without some severe nostalgia; however, the real difficulty lies in the pervasiveness of corn in the American diet.

Because of my relative success, many people have asked me for the guildelines I follow in eliminating corn from my diet.  Beward – purging your diet of corn is not for the lazy or faint of heart.  It takes an abundance of dedication, research, and perseverence.  I believe it is worth it.  In response to the questions, I have prepared for you my short  list of corn avoidance rules.  While written with a bit of humor to counterbalance the bitterness of the task, I am also being serious about what can be involved.

  1. Do not eat processed foods – not ever.  If you feel you absolutely must eat something that comes in a package, don’t eat it if it contains an ingredient you cannot read or do now know what it is.
  2. Make everything from scratch so that you know what is in it.  Even your common spice containers may be suspect.
  3. If you don’t have to peel it, chop it, or core it – eat with great caution.
  4. Put manifacturer’s phone numbers on speed dial. Plan to call the company before using almost anything in a box, can, or frozen food section.  Remember, corn does not have to be labeled.  The fact that it isn’t listed as an allergen on the package doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
  5. Never assume you know what is in the product you are ready to eat.  Even powdered sugar has corn starch.
  6. If it is something that could stick together, but isn’t sticking, it probably has corn starch to prevent the sticking.
  7. If it comes in a pill/tablet – assume it has corn in it until proven otherwise.  It should be listed on all medication package inserts and your pharmacist should be able to check it out as well.  Unfortunately all of the ingredients in your medications don’t simply say corn.  They will be called something else most of the time.
  8. Only buy supplements or vitamins that specifically state NO CORN.  “No corn added” is not sufficient and is a real give away that there is probably corn. If it is supposed to be chewable it has to be sweetened with something.  That something is often corn.
  9. Bottled spiced and herbs, condiments, sauces, and gravy are all suspect.  Call the company or make your own.
  10. Deli meats almost all contain corn.  Roast your own turkey, beef, or chicken at home and slice it thin.  Think like a pioneer woman. Convenience does not exist.  You need to pre-plan everything.  If you do the planning, it can almost feel like convenience on some days.
  11. Buy a very nice insulated cooler/lunchbox and carry most of your meals with you.  This is a place to make a good investment.  If you happen to go somewhere that is corn safe, count your blessings and take your food back home for another day.
  12. Always carry corn-free snacks in your car, purse, briefcase, or pocket.  Don’t be caught unprepared.
  13. If you are going to eat out, skip the condiments that are on the table.  Tell your server that you would like to speak to the kitchen manager because you cannot eat corn.  I have found most places to be very knowledgable and willing to feed me safetly.  I carry a laminated card with me that lists my food allergies so that the kitchen can have it while preparing my food.

For people with serious corn allergy it gets even worse from here since many other things are also made from corn products, including plastic bottles we drink from.  I have not become sick from a plastic bottle yet, but do try to stay away from them.

I know it sounds like a lot, but my philosophy is that it is a small price to pay to keep me feeling healthy.

Snacking versus Parenting: The Impact of TV Commercials

There has been a commercial on TV that makes me crazy.  The first time I watched it I felt annoyed, but thought I was just having a bad day. The second time (and third time) I saw it I was still annoyed so decided I should look a little bit deeper. The basic story is that here is a child who wants and snack and he whines through the grocery store until mom gets him one. I think the message is supposed to be that this produce it a good choice that can satisfy moms and kids. Nutrition aside – I understand the message.

Unfortunately, there are some other messages contained within this commercial as well.

  • It is acceptable for children to whine to get what they want
  • Good parenting involves giving in to whining children
  • Processed foods are better snacks than whole foods

From a public health perspective, what would happen if the images on television were of children eating healthy foods? I can think of only one commercial on TV that depicts children eating vegetables and liking them. I can think of many commercials and even more television shows that involve parents hiding vegetables to get kids to eat them, children hiding vegetables to pretend that they have eaten them, and other subtle messages to communicate that vegetables are bad and children should not like them.  While I would have still been offended by this commercial, it would have been less offensive if the mom had gone to the produce section of the grocery store and picked up a carrot for the young boy.

Even though the child was whining, everyone still appeared pretty happy. I was never happy when my children whined in public.  I learned very quickly that giving in to the whining only made them whine more often.  There was no correction for the behavior in the commercial.  The background message here is that giving in is normal or acceptable. This message, when viewed repeatedly, can’t help but desensitize us to this inappropriate behavior. Where are the media messages that show children behaving appropriately and parents dealing with childhood misbehavior calmly and rationally?

Many children and adults have viewed this commercial and I suspect that most never notice the messages that I did.  That doesn’t mean that the message doesn’t have an impact though.  Advertising works. In the past I’ve definitely purchased things based on the commercials and jingles. As may awareness has increased, I’m trying to do a better job of avoiding products that perpetuate negative attitudes and behaviors. As yourself these questions:

  1. Does this commercial communicate accurate information about the product?
  2. Does this commercial communicate life views that are consistent with mine?
  3. Does this commercial include people behaving in a way that is inappropriate or dangerous?

If you answered yes to any of these, please consider making a different consumer choice.  Children need to see images of other children behaving appropriately, not children behaving badly and getting away with it. Parents need to see images of other parents acting calmly and confidently with their children. Insisting on this change through our consumerism could have a significant impact on everyone.

I’d love to hear your views on this.  How do television commercials impact your consumer decisions?

I’ve Been Such A Good Girl

When I first published this article several years ago the title was I’ve Been Such A Good Girl – I think I’d like to poison myself today.  That title sounds very provocative doesn’t it? But that is exactly what I was doing almost every day.  I would reward myself for good behavior with substances that poison my body and strengthen the cravings for that poison.  If I was good I would reward myself with ice cream.  Although I learned to eat smaller portions, it was still essentially a poison in my body.  If I had been really good I would reward myself with a slice of carrot cake from my favorite gluten free bakery.  OK, it was gluten free, but it still had so many calories that it was bad for by body and my health.  In addition, once I would eat it I was out of control for the rest of the day.

While I no longer look forward to opportunities to hurt my body, I have slipped back into the habit of thinking of unhealthy foods as rewards or eating larger portions than my body can handle.  There are so many “diets” out there that build in opportunities for unhealthy indulgences.  While that may help to overcome the feelings of deprivation that derail so many eating plans, it still doesn’t address the obsession with certain foods and messed up priorities. (Such as ice cream being more important than health.)

Its not like I’ve ever been really hungry and am reacting to that memory of hunger with overindulgence. I’m not hoarding food because I am preparing for a day of famine.  Someday I hope to wake up from the nightmare of food addiction.  It would be so cool to just eat when I’m hungry, eat the food my body needs, and stop looking forward to opportunities for unhealthy food.

I did pretty well for the last several years until a period of very high physical and emotional stress knocked me out of balance and I found myself again craving foods that I know are not in my best interest.  I haven’t started eating foods that I am allergic to, but those unhealthy foods that I am not officially allergic to have crept back into my pantry and my body.  I fell prey to the “anything in moderation” wisdom that is so prevalent.

The truth – at least my truth – is that I can’t handle eating some foods.  They change how I feel, how I think, and how my body functions.  If you share this experience I’d love to hear from you.