Are you struggling with your weight? I am, and I’m finding it a little hard to accept since I literally wrote a book on losing weight. I was successful for quite a few years but recently have gained some weight. I’m inviting you to join me as I re-start my weight loss/health improvement journey.
This video is the first in what I hope will be a series of very real, very personal, and very successful tapping experiences to get me back on track. As with all good journeys we need a starting point so listen in on my back story and future plan.
Stay tuned. The next video will be on resistence to doing portion control.
What is it you are really ordering when you go to a restaurant. Do you order food or are you ordering comfort? Many people who struggle with weight are ordering comfort. They are not thinking about how they will feel nourished. They are not thinking about how they will feel healthier.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – When I go to a restaurant, I don’t really order food, I order comfort. I think about how I will feel more than how it will nourish my body. I am pretty sure I would be healthier if I thought about nourishment when eating and thought about comfort when I am doing other things. Even though I have food and comfort somehow confused, I love and accept myself and am thankful that I am finally getting some clarity about this issue. Even though I have confused food and comfort in the past, I am excited about a new way of thinking about this. Even though I have confused food and comfort in the past, and I am feeling just a little stubborn about giving it up, I love and accept myself anyway.
Eyebrow…I need comfort
Side of Eye…And I do it with food
Under the Eye…I have confused food with comfort
Under the Nose…And I would like to find a way to deal with that
Chin…I want comfort
Collarbone…I haven’t been good about getting it except through food
Under the Arm…I want that to change
Top of Head…This need to get comfort through food
Eyebrow…I have a need to get comfort through food
Side of Eye…Even though I want comfort
Under the Eye…I choose to let food be food
Under the Nose…It is ok to enjoy it
Chin…But it doesn’t – CAN’T – fill up the empty spot inside of me
Collarbone…It is ok to want comfort
Under the Arm…It is ok to like food
Top of Head…I choose to seek other ways to get comfort in my life
BONUS TAPPING: Begin tapping on the spots. Repeat the word “failure” aloud. Continue tapping while focusing on the thoughts and feelings associated with failure as it relates to your eating habits.
There are many people who enjoy a glass or two of wine and feel that it helps them to relax. There are also people who are watching their calories and know that wine doesn’t help much with that daily calorie count. Here is a tapping that might help with that decision-making.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – Even though wine helps me relax in the evening, I know that it adds to the calories I’m taking in each day. I don’t even want to think about giving that up too. I’ve already given up so many foods that I love in order to lose weight. Giving up my wine just doesn’t feel like it is even possible. What would I do to relax in the evening instead? Even though this conflict feels very uncomfortable to me, I am open to wisdom and clarity. Even though I am reluctant to give up my glass of wine in the evening, and I suspect that it is making it harder for me to reach my weight loss goals, I love and accept myself anyway.
Eyebrow…Wine helps me relax in the evening
Side of Eye…I just don’t know what I would do without it
Under the Eye…I am afraid that I would be uptight and anxious
Under the Nose…I certainly don’t want that
Chin…Besides, they say wine is good for you
Collarbone…It is almost a health food
Under the Arm…I really do know better than that
Top of Head…I don’t like the idea that I have to drink wine just to relax
Eyebrow…It wold be nice if I could come up with some other things that relax me too
Side of Eye…Maybe things that don’t have so many calories
Under the Eye…Or even things that burn calories
Under the Nose…That would be nice
Chin…I could ask for help so I don’t feel overwhelmed
Collarbone…Wine does help be relax in the evening
Under the Arm…Adding all of the those calories on to the end of my day isn’t really what I want in the long run
Top of Head…But I don’t want anybody to take it away from me
Eyebrow…I am choosing what calories I want to put in my body
Side of Eye…Sometimes I might plan my day so that I have a glass of wine
Under the Eye…Some days I might not
Under the Nose…Nothing bad will happen to me if I don’t drink wine
Chin…There are lots of ways I can take care of myself
Collarbone…It feels good to know that I have choices
Under the Arm…It feels good to take care of myself
Top of Head…It feels good to know I can always tap if I need to relax
If you aren’t feeling completely calm about this yet, keep tapping. Use your own words and describe how you really feel about the situation to get the most relief.
There is a thing that happens when we get off track with our diet plan. The thought “I might as well eat whatever I want because I already blew it” pops in. Sometimes I am able to think “get back on track right now”, but usually I set some date in the future to resume healthy eating. The tapping exercise below may help.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – I already blew my diet so I might as well eat whatever I want. There’s no point in controlling my food now. I’ve already pointed the guilt finger at myself. I’m already wallowing in blame. So I might as well eat. Even though all of these things are true, I want to love and accept myself anyway. It is pretty hard to love and accempt myself with all of this guilt and shame, but I am open to the possibility that I could do it. Even though I am a quitter and planning to give up immediately just because I slipped off my food plan, I want to choose to start again right now.
Eyebrow…I already blew it
Side of Eye…I already ate something that is on my forbidden list
Under the Eye…I ate way too much of it too
Under the Nose…I feel the guilt and shame
Chin…I might as well go ahead and eat whatever I want
Collarbone…That is what quitters do
Under the Arm…I am a guilt and shameful quitter
Top of Head…Ouch. That smarts.
Eyebrow…Sometimes I give up
Side of Eye…Sometimes I don’t
Under the Eye…I don’t have to give up just because I made a mistake
Under the Nose…I have options
Chin…I have choices
Collarbone…”I already blew it” might not be totally accurate
Under the Arm…I wouldn’t tell anyone else to give up just because of a simple error
Top of Head…I am not going to tell myself that right now either. I can start back on my food plan whenever I choose, including now.
This example is shorter and for illustration only. With a topic like this, I probably would not switch from the negative to the positive so quickly in real life. After the first round of negative tapping I recommend checking in to see how much change has occurred. In this case “I already blew it” should have an intensity below 3 before moving on to the positive tapping in order to fully deal with this issue.
I can ignore my health. That is a great example of unhealthy thinking. But it is also an example of something most of us really think. If you think it is harmful to your body why do you want to eat it on your birthday, or any other time? I don’t have an answer for you, but I do have a short tapping to get you started.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – Even though I feel entitled to overeat on my birthday, I choose to keep my goals in mind. Even though I feel that I really deserve to blow my diet since it is a special occasion, I choose to consider finding ways to celebrate without hurting my body or my health. Even though there is a possibility that I will “blow it”, I deeply and completely accept myself including the parts of me that want this indulgence.
Eyebrow…It’s my birthday
Side of Eye…I deserve to eat whatever I want
Under the Eye…It doesn’t seem fair to have to say no to food on my birthday
Under the Nose…I want steak or lobster
Chin…I want cake and ice cream
Collarbone…I want pancakes and bacon for breakfast
Under the Arm…How can my day be special without those things?
Top of Head…Of course I could eat all of that but just eat smaller portions
Eyebrow..But I’m not sure that would satisfy me either
Side of Eye…Shouldn’t I be able to have whatever I want on my birthday?
Under the Eye…The answer is yes. But, maybe I should look closer at what I really want.
Under the Nose…Will those foods make me feel good about myself?
Chin…No they won’t
Collarbone…Will overeating make me feel loved?
Under the Arm…No it won’t
Top of Head…I want to choose to find ways to love myself on my birthday without hurting my health
Take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Now is the time to keep tapping with the answers to some of those questions. What do you really want? How can you show yourself love without hurting your health?
BONUS TAPPING: Name 3 comfort foods. While tapping through the points, describe them in as much detail as you possibly can. Continue tapping while you describe your first memory of these foods. Spend some time thinking about what these foods mean to you, when you crave them the most, and how you feel when you eat them.
Have you lost the same 5, 10, or 15 pounds over and over again? You work really hard to get them off, yet you seem to gain them back almost over night. Then you do it all over again. This sequence of events is addressed in today’s tapping example.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – Even though I’ve lost this same 5 pounds before, I choose to be amazed at how easy it will be to keep it off this time. Even though I’ve lost this same 5 pounds before I respect my choice to lose it, or not lose it again. Even though I’ve lost this same 5 pounds before I love and accept myself with or without those 5 pounds.
Eyebrow…I am so depressed
Side of Eye…Because I’ve lost the same 5 pounds before
Under the Eye…Not just once
Under the Nose…But over and over again
Chin…That feels like failure to me
Collarbone…I know it doesn’t have to keep happening that way
Under the Arm…But it feels like this cycle will never stop
Top of Head…I acknowledge my frustration
Eyebrow…I acknolwedge that I am feeling bad about this
Side of Eye…I don’t want to continue the struggle
Under the Eye…I would like to find a way to make this easier
Under the Nose…Stressing out over it won’t help me reach my goal
Chin…I am proud of myself for not giving up
Collarbone…I’d like to keep it off this time
Under the Arm…And I am open to having it be much easier
Top of Head…I love and accept myself, with or without this struggle.
Take a deep breath and let it out gently. How do you feel about the 5 pounds now? This exercise isn’t really about the 5 pounds. Most people’s weight fluctuates and the truth is that the ups happen much more easily for some people than the downs. How we feel about those fluctuations is the real issue and can set us up for even more difficulty. The key to this exercise is asserting that you can love and accept yourself no matter what your weight.
Are you feeling brave? If so, take a look at your stomach. Take a really good look at it from the front, the side, clothed, and naked. Write down the first words that pop into your mind and then tap about those.
One of the most frequent comments I get about tapping is that people don’t know where to start. They know, or have some basic idea, what the problem is but they get all hung up on the words. It is worth repeating – the words themselves are not magic. Tapping without words still works. I always encourage people to start where they are. After you start tapping, inspiration will come. The following tapping models how to tap about feeling shame about eating. It starts with the very basic setup “Even though I feel ashamed about my eating” and uses the reminder phrase “This eating shame.”
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – Even though I feel ashamed about my eating I choose to love and accept myself anyway. Even though I feel ashamed about my eating, I choose to love and accept myself unconditionally. Even though I feel ashamed about my eating, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
Eyebrow…This eating shame
Side of Eye…This eating shame
Under the Eye…This eating shame
Under the Nose…This eating shame
Chin…This eating shame
Collarbone…This eating shame
Under the Arm…This eating shame
Top of Head…This eating shame
So you might look at this and think, “She just repeated the same thing over and over.” That’s right! You can make a lot of headway just repeating that phrase if it really is what you are feeling. Then, when you start feeling or thinking something different, tap on that. Keep repeating until you feel a shift. In my experience, something always comes up. It might be a memory of when someone else shamed you about your eating. I can share with you that when I did this one about 10 times a memory popped up of someone specifically saying to me “You should be ashamed of yourself.” That was my next thing to tap on in order to release the shame.
I have discovered that one of my triggers for mindless eating is frustration. Frustration is defined as a negative emotion that occurs because of the inability to change or achieve something. When I am in that state I seek relief through any means necessary, and fortunately (or unfortunately) I have found that food works – at least for a little while. In that instance, tapping about the food cravings doesn’t seem to work. Instead, I needed to tap on the feeling of frustration in order to break the pattern.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – I’m frustrated, not just about one thing, but about many things. I don’t like this feeling. I can’t seem to fix the things that I’m frustrated about, so I want something sweet and delicious to make me feel better. Even though I am feeling frustrated by all of these things, I choose to manage the real issue, not just cover it up with a sugar high. Even though I am feeling frustrated and just want it to magically go away, I choose to remain open to solutions instead of causing another problem with poor food choices. Even though I really want to eat sweet things right now, I choose to release the frustration instead.
Side of Eye…This frustration
Under the Eye…I’m really feeling frustrated
Under the Nose…I’m frustrated
Collarbone…I want this frustration to just go away
Under the Arm…I’m frustrated
Top of Head…This frustration
Eyebrow…I’m so frustrated
Side of Eye…But I am open to seeing options
Under the Eye…I am frustrated
Under the Nose…But I am open to seeking solutions
Chin…I am frustrated
Collarbone…But I choose to allow an easy resolution
Under the Arm…I am frustrated
Top of Head…But I choose to take care of myself without relying on food
Take a deep breath and let it out slowly. By giving your emotion a voice and acknowledging how you feel and how you are responding it breaks the pattern and gives you the freedom to address the real issue that is frustrating you from a place of clarity and calm.
People have many different emotions about their body. Although there are some people who are completely satisfied with their weight and appearance, I don’t personally know very many. What I hear more often is people that are angry about their weight and body. Unfortunately, being angry with yourself doesn’t generally lead to resolution and change. That’s where tapping can help.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – Even though I feel angry about the way my body looks, I deeply and completely love and accept myself right now. Even though I feel angry about the way my body looks, I am open to the possibility that I could feel differently about this tomorrow. Even though I feel angry about the way my body looks, I choose to take inspired action rather than reacting to this negative emotion.
Eyebrow…I am so angry
Side of Eye…I hate the way my body looks
Under the Eye…And I did this to myself
Under the Nose…I am so angry about the way my body looks
Chin…Doing anything about this feels almost impossible
Collarbone…This anger isn’t very healthy for me
Under the Arm…And probably makes it even harder to lose weight
Top of Head…I acknowledge my anger
Eyebrow…I acknowledge my challenges
Side of Eye…I accept who I am, even with this less than perfect body
Under the Eye…I have been so angry
Under the Nose…I have been angry about my body’s appearance
Chin…And I blame myself for it
Collarbone…That means I’ve been angry with myself
Under the Arm…I accept where I am right now
Top of Head…And I look forward to a future where I can accept my body too.
Take a deep breath and let it out gently. At first glance it may seem that we haven’t changed anything with this tapping. This is a necessary starting point for creating any lasting change around weight and body issues. It is absolutely essential to first accept the truth of where we are openly and honestly, and without blame or shame. From that place of acceptance, miracles can happen.
How many different excuses have you found to avoid exercise? I could probably fill a book with them. Tomorrow is a busy day is a common one for me, but I’ve also used my busy day today as an excuse. Even though I know tapping will work to overcome my resistance, sometimes I also avoid tapping in order to avoid the exercise. If you can make your self do it, I know that this one works.
Setup (Karate Chop Point) – Even though I don’t think I can exercise tonight since I’ve had such a busy day, I choose to anticipate joy and relief that I am taking good care of my body. Right now I don’t think I can exercise becaues of my busy day, but I reserve the option to re-evaluate in a few minutes when I have taken the time to regroup. Even though I have some excuses about exercising tonight, I choose to consider whether this choice is congruent with my goals or not. I choose to love and accept myself either way.
Eyebrow…I have had a very busy day
Side of Eye…So I don’t think I can really exercise tonight
Under the Eye…It would just be too much
Under the Nose…I worked so hard that I deserve to just do nothing for a while
Chin…Just one night off won’t really matter
Collarbone…I deserve it
Under the Arm…What am I saying?
Top of Head…Do I deserve to be unhealthy?
Eyebrow…I love the way I feel after I exercise
Side of Eye…It is true that it doesn’t always feel great to get started
Under the Eye…It is true that it sometimes seems pretty hard in the beginning
Under the Nose…I always feel proud of myself when I have the self discipline to exercise
Chin…I could just get started and then quit when my body says it has had enough
Collarbone…If the hectic day means a shorter workout that’s ok
Under the Arm…If the hectic day means a longer workout would be good to help me de-stress, that’s ok too
Top of Head…I am open to body guidance about this
This tapping exercise was written a long time ago and was included in Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping. It is highly relevant for me right now. Today I joined a new gym and the excuses for getting started are already swirling around in my head. I flipped open the book and saw this one. Definitely a message from the Universe.