The ostrich is a totem for wisdom. How do you react to others who have more experience than you do? Do you invite and welcome their wisdom into your life or do you insist on figuring everything out yourself? Do you rely to much on others rather than trusting in your own wisdom? This short tapping exercise may help you become more aware of your issues in this area.
Setup (Karate Chop Point): Having others aroun dis important to me. Being able to learn from their experience and draw upon their wisdom when I am faced with new challenges or overwhelming situations is really beneficial. Also, there really is safety in numbers. I’m feeling pretty isolated right now, but I love and accept myself anyway. I want the safety of my herd. I love and accept myself. I crave the wise counsel of others. I deeply and completely love and accept myself.
Eyebrow…I feel like an ostrich
Side of Eye…Seeking safety in numbers
Under the Eye…And attempting to protect myself
Under the Nose…By hanging out with the crowd
Chin…Watching how others handle things
Collarbone…Is how I learn
Under the Arm…I need to be careful about who I watch
Top of Head…I can learn what works
Eyebrow…And I can learn what doesn’t
Side of Eye…I just have to be smart enough
Under the Eye…To know the difference
Under the Nose…I feel like an ostrich
Chin…That can be good or not so good
Collarbone…I like having a group around me
Under the Arm…It keeps me safe
Top of Head…It helps me grow
As I noted before, this was a short tapping just to get your own thoughts and feelings moving. Write down any thoughts or feelings that you noticed while tapping. Are there specific situations in which you sought out the safety of the crowd that didn’t go as well as you wanted? Tap about those. Were there situations in which you chose to follow the example that was a what not to do instead of a what to do? Those would be good to tap about as well.
Believe it or not, this is a very old tapping exercise, but it seems appropriate for today’s social climate. It was included in a chapter about current stressors in my first book Tap It Away: 10 Minutes to Freedom with EFT. This tapping is about the intense emotions people experience when talking about politics.
Some people may actually be afraid to do this tapping because they equate the decrease in intense emotions with lack of conviction. Tapping on the intense emotions will not take away your conviction but it will allow for better control and more ease around others that may believe differently than you do.
The story begins with Joe, a normally reasonable and mild-mannered man who was having difficulty at family gatherings because his political views were radically different from those of other family members. Joe and his wife actually dreaded holidays such as Thanksgiving where there was extended contact that allowed ample time for such discussions. Joe really wanted to be able to control his emotions better when family members disagreed with him, failed to listen to his views, or even provoked him to just get a reaction. Tapping was a perfrect tool for the situation.
Is this scenario something you can relate to? Let’s tap.
Say this problem statement aloud, “I can’t handle it when other people don’t respect my political views.” Rate the intensity (or truth) of this statement on a 0-10 scale (10 is very true). Write down your number.
Say these setup statements while tapping on the karate chop point: Even though I can’t handle it when other people don’t respect my political views, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Even though I get really angry when other people don’t agree with my political views, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Even though it feels like other people aren’t respecting my political views when they disagree with me, and I don’t handle it very well, I deeply and completely love and accept myself and all of my feels on this subject.
Eyebrow…I can’t handle it when other people don’t respect my political views
Side of Eye…I get pretty upset when others disagree with my politics
Under the Eye…It is dangerous to discuss politics with anyone that doesn’t agree with my view
Under the Nose…Because I can’t handle it
Chin…I’m so sure that my political views are right
Collarbone…That I can’t handle it when anyone has a different opinion
Under the Arm…I can’t handle it when anyone can’t see the value of my political views
Top of Head…I can’t handle any challenge to my political views without getting very upset
Take a deep breath and let it out. Check the intensity of your original problem statement “I can’t handle it when other people don’t respect my political views.” Record your new rating. Continue tapping with these statements until your intensity rating is low. Once your rating is below a 3 or 4, feel free to move on to the positive affirmation reminder phrases below.
Eyebrow…Even though I can’t handle it when other people don’t respect my political views right now
Side of Eye…I am trying to maintain an open mind
Under the Eye…Even though I haven’t been able to handle it as well as I would like in the past
Under the Nose…I am open to feeling more comfortable with challenges to my views in the future
Chin…Even though I’m pretty convinced that I am right
Collarbone…I am trying to be okay with others’ opinions
Under the Arm…Even when I feel they are wrong
Top of Head…I love and respect my own views and calmly allow allows to have their views.
Take a deep breath and let it out gently. Check the intensity of your original problem statement “I can’t handle it when other people don’t respect my political views.” Write down your new rating.
If politics is one of your stressors, be sure to notice what additional thoughts and feelings come up and write them down for future tapping. It may be important for you to tap on those additional issues.
Unfortunately I am no stranger to feeling out of control with food. It is a huge issue that I have not completely eliminated. Fortunately the fear of of losing control is something that rarely sneaks up on me, so when I first notice it I can usually find relief in tapping. What follows is a short tapping that you can use when you start to worry about losing control.
Setup (Karate Chop Point): Even though I am afraid I will lose control if confronted with any of my favorite foods, I deeply and completely love and accept myself. Even though I am afraid that I will lose control and eat too much or eat foods that are not healthy for me, I choose to focus on loving myself and my healthy body instead. Even though I am afraid that I will lose control and eat like a pig, I choose to feel calm and confident, even twhen those comfort foods are readily available.
Eyebrow…I am afraid I will lose control
Side of Eye…I am afraid I will eat like a pig
Under the Eye…I am afraid my food plan will go right out the window
Under the Nose…I can’t control myself around those foods
Chin…I am afraid I will lose control
Collarbone…I am afraid I will eat too much
Under the Arm…I am afraid I will eat unhealthy foods
Top of Head…I am afraid I will lose control
Continue with these or similar phrases until you feel relief
Did you benefit from this tapping? I’d love to hear about your success.
Who likes the feeling of deprivation? I certainly don’t. Dread related to feeling deprived can stop
people from making positive changes in their diet, particularly if they currently
partake in something known to be less than healthy or even dangerous. Today’s tapping is short, but is a starting
place for addressing the fear of deprivation.
Say this statement aloud, “I will feel deprived if I cannot
eat my favorite foods.” How true does
that feel to you? Rate it on the 0-10 scale
(10=is very strong or very true.)
Setup (Karate Chop Point): Even though I am afraid of how I
will feel if I don’t eat my favorite foods. I choose to love and accept myself
anyway. Even though I am sure I will feel deprived without my favorite foods, I
am hopeful that I can find other sources of pleasure in my life. Even though the fear of deprivation is very
strong for me, I am beginning to consider small diet changes that will help me
to be healthy and happy.
Eyebrow…I feel deprived
Side of Eye…I want to eat my favorite foods
Under the Eye…I don’t want to feel deprived
Under the Nose…I need to eat or I will feel deprived
Chin…I will do anything to avoid that feeling
Collarbone…This deprivation
Under the Arm…Fear of deprivation
Top of Head…This strong feeling of deprivation
Say the original statement again, “I will feel deprived if I
cannot eat my favorite foods?” How true
does that feel to you now? Did specific
foods pop in your mind? Continue tapping
about how it would feel to not eat those foods or to eat them less often. Did your mind drift to specific thoughts,
feelings, or sensations related to deprivation?
Continue tapping about how much you want to avoid those thoughts,
feelings, and sensations.
Did
you know that there are more than 10,000 ant species? I didn’t. I knew that there were red ones, brown ones,
black ones, ants that bite, and ants that don’t. Ants are social insects and usually live in
communities that have a queen ant. The
worker ants are female. They have no
wings, don’t reproduce, but have many duties within the colony such as foraging
for food, caring for the queen’s baby ants, and protecting the community. Male ants have only one job – making baby
ants with the queen. After they are done
with that task they usually die.
Not
very long ago I had an interesting infestation of ants in my kitchen. Actually it really wasn’t an infestation with
swarms of ants everywhere; it was more of a semi-constant trickle. I did some cleaning and they seemed to be
gone. That lasted about 3 hours then I
saw another one walking across the kitchen floor. A few hours later I saw one walking across a kitchen
counter.
I
don’t harbor an intense dislike of ants and I don’t usually go out of my way to
kill them if they are outside, but I don’t want them on my kitchen counters or
in my drawers, and I don’t want to squish them under my bare feet when walking
in the kitchen. Since they broke our “agreement”
to stay outside I decided to spray the baseboards to try to stop them from
coming in. That lasted for about 8
hours, then more ants.
While
this ant battle was going on I was also having some struggles at work. I felt that I was being treated as insignificant,
not being allowed to exercise my own judgment and creativity, and just felt
that I was generally not appreciated. ON the inside I was rebelling about all
of this as was trying to assert my individualism within a culture that clearly
doesn’t value that.
The
ants kept coming and I continued to feel dissatisfied. One morning while doing
my lap swim I had the thought, “what if the ants are acting as one of my
totems?” I started thinking about the ant characteristics that I’ve been
writing about and became even more sure of it.
I phoned a friend and shared my insight, thinking that it was hilarious
that I had overlooked this possibility and quipped, “wouldn’t it be hysterical
if the ants were gone when I get home?” After all, I had finally received the
message about being industrious, fitting in, stamina, and perseverance.
When
I got home the ants were indeed gone. I’m
sure that I have more work to do pertaining to managing employment while
nurturing my own dreams. I am glad the ants were persistent and that I finally
caught on. It does make me wonder how
many other times there have been animal totems willing to point me in the right
direction, but I somehow missed out on getting the message.
Tapping
Meditation
To
get started, lets do a tapping meditation to get in touch with some of the
characteristics associated with ants and to get ready for whatever messages
ants might have for you.
Eyebrow
Ant
Side of Eye
Social
Under the Eye
Ant
Under the Nose
Colony
Chin
Ant
Collarbone
Solves complex problems
Under the Arm
Ant
Top of Head
Interactive
Eyebrow
Ant
Side of Eye
Industrious
Under the Eye
Ant
Under the Nose
Cooperative effort
Chin
Ant
Collarbone
Hard work
Under the Arm
Ant
Top of Head
Group-minded
Eyebrow
Ant
Side of Eye
Perseverance
Under the Eye
Ant
Under the Nose
Self discipline
Chin
Ant
Collarbone
Teamwork
Under the Arm
Ant
Top of Head
Orderly
Eyebrow
Ant
Side of Eye
Stamina
Under the Eye
Ant
Under the Nose
Honor
Chin
Ant
Collarbone
What message to you have for me?
Under the Arm
Ant
Top of Head
Open to the message of ants
Keep tapping while considering the knowledge, experiences,
and meaning that the ant may have for you. Be sure to write down any thoughts,
beliefs, or feelings that arise when you have finished the tapping meditation.
Which characteristics of the ant would you want more of? Which characteristics
do you have in abundance?
For me, the ant is a fairly neutral symbol. I was raised on the image of ants being a nuisance
when they visit a picnic. I have also
seen the painful bites or stings from fire ants. I’ve been intrigued by ant hills and loved
the movie Ants. I even had an ant farm
when I was growing up.
Ants are actually pretty important in Native American
culture and lore. The Hope, Pueblo, and Akimal O’odham tribes have Ant Clans.
The Cherokee celebrate with an Ant Dance. In the Cahuilla creation myth ants spread the
earth out for people and animals to live upon. In a Hopi myth the ant people
provided shelter to the humans during the destruction of the First World. The industriousness and cooperative spirit
associated with ants is often the focus of these stories.
Ants are also a common feature in literature. Ants are mentioned in the Bible and in the
Quran. Ants were featured in A Tramp
Abroad by Mark Twain, The Once and Future King by T.H. White, Les Fourmis by
Bernard Werber, and The Empire of the Ants by H.G. Wells. Do you remember the cartoon Atom Ant? Did you have an ant farm when you were
growing up? Did you play the game Ants
in the Pants? Maybe you are more
familiar with the movies Antz by Dream Works Animation in which Z-4195 longs
for the opportunity to express himself or the movie A Bugs Life from Pixar
Animation Studios in which the misfit ant Flik fancies himself to be an individualist
and inventor.
The above selection was from my upcoming book Unleash Your Primal Power: Totem Tapping for Health and Happiness. If you read my first book Tap It Away: 10 Minutes to Freedom With EFT you might remember that there was a chapter devoted to using animal characterstics to guide tapping on personality characteristics and change. The upcoming book is an expansion of the concept.
As we continue our resolutions related to food, exercise, and health in 2019 we will continue to use tapping to increase our odds of success. The next tapping exercise begins to address some of the emotional reasons we eat. In this case it is the feeling that food is our friend. For some people, food may feel like their only friend.
Say this statement aloud, “Food is my only friend.” How true does that feel to you? It may be a stronger feeling on some days than others. Rate it on the 0-10 scale (10=is very strong or very true.)
Setup (Karate Chop Point): Even though it feels sometimes
like food is my only friend, I deeply and completely love and accept myself
anyway. Even though I eat junk food when
I am lonely, and I am afraid of losing my only friend if I stop eating, I
choose to find other ways to manage this feeling. Even though it is terrifying to think of
changing my relationship with my food/friend.
I am open to a new way of being.
Eyebrow…Food is my friend
Side of Eye…How can I give that up?
Under the Eye…Sometimes I think food is my only friend
Under the Nose…I have no idea what I would do instead of
eating when I feel lonely
Chin…Even the thought makes me want to eat more
Collarbone…Food feels like my best friend
Under the Arm…Everyone wants a best friend
Top of Head…And it’s always there when I need it
Eyebrow…Food never lets me down
Side of Eye…I always feel better when I eat ice cream or
chocolate
Under the Eye…At least for a little while
Under the Nose…Later I feel pretty bad
Chin…I am open to others ways of handling these feelings
Collarbone…Food is just food
Under the Arm…It is ok to enjoy it, but I can learn how to
handle these other feelings in different ways
Top of Head…Feelings are just feelings, and I can handle
them.
Say the original statement again, “Food is my only
friend.” How true does that feel to you
now? Did other thoughts or feelings come
up? Did you find yourself arguing with
any of the statements? Those are great
opportunities to continue your tapping on this issue until the truth of the
original statement is very low.
Are you still on the path for improved health and wellness in 2019? Is the resolution still firmly in mind? Hopefully our last tapping was a good starting point for managing the barriers to success. One of the things that came up for me when thinking about my love-hate relationship with food was the quality of my thinking. I’m just not very rational when I think about food. That is what today’s tapping is about. Say this statement: “I have trouble thinking about food in a rational way.” How true is that for you on the 0-10 scale (10=very rue).
Setup (karate chop
point): Even though I have trouble thinking about food in a rational way, I
deeply and completely love and accept myself.
Even though food is a highly emotional subject for me, I am working
toward a different way of relating to food, meals, and eating. Even though I have an emotional reaction to
food, I love and accept myself, knowing that I am a work in progress.
Eyebrow…I get
irrational about food
Side of Eye…Thinking about food makes me emotional
Under the Eye…Thinking about not having certain foods makes
me emotional
Under the Nose…Thinking about limiting certain foods makes
me emotional
Chin…Everything about food and eating makes me emotional
Collarbone…And don’t say the word diet to me
Under the Arm…I am working on changing these emotional
responses
Top of Head…I look forward to seeing food in a new way.
Now say that beginning statement again, “I have trouble
thinking about food in a rational way.”
Rate it again on the 0-10 scale.
Was there any change? It may have
gone up, gone down, or stayed the same.
The relative change is new information to use in your tapping. Here are some suggestions to make it more
powerful.
Substitute a particular food instead of the word
“food” to make it more specific if there is a food or group of foods that
brings the strongest emotional reaction.
Tap while thinking about how much you believe
you would miss a particular food
Tap while using your original rating number,
“This 9-feeling in my gut when I think about not eating _____”
If you are feeling particularly impatient with
the slow progress….tap about your lack of patience with an affirmation about
being a work in progress.
Remember you can find these and other tapping exercises to assist in your health and wellness in Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping. I’d love to hear back from you about your successes or to answer any questions.
Whenever the word should shows up in your thoughts or conversations it is a pretty good sign that prior programming is at work. Should is a very dangerous word. It leads to feelings of guilt and shame. Although your mother might disagree with me, there are very few real shoulds in this world. Most of the time you could substitute “I would prefer it if you would” or “I want you to”, or “it might be easier/better/safer if” instead of the word should.
Say this problem statement aloud, “I shouldn’t be feeling this way.” Rate the intensity on the 0-10
point scale and record your rating.
Setup (karate chop point): Even though I know I shouldn’t be feeling this way, I choose to love, accept, and forgive myself anyway. Even though I know I shouldn’t be feeling this way, I choose to love, accept, and forgive myself anyway. Even though I know I shouldn’t be feeling this way, I choose to love, accept, and forgive myself anyway.
Eyebrow…I shouldn’t be feeling this way Side of Eye…I don’t even know why it is bothering me Under the Eye…I don’t think I should be feeling this way Under the Nose…Just admitting that I feel this way really bothers me Chin…I feel bad that I feel this way Collarbone…I’d like to pretend that I feel something different Under the Arm…Then no one would know that I feel this way Top of Head…No one would judge me for feeling this way Eyebrow…I shouldn’t be feeling this way Side of Eye…But my feelings are real Under the Eye…And my feelings are ok Under the Nose…I don’t need to be afraid of my feelings Chin…And I don’t need to judge my feelings Collarbone…My feelings happen naturally Under the Arm…No matter what my feelings are – I’m in control of how I express them Top of Head…I choose to acknowledge my feelings, whatever they are Eyebrow…Who told me I shouldn’t feel this way? Side of Eye…What do they know about this? Under the Eye…They are MY feelings Under the Nose…My feelings are an acceptable part of who I am Chin…I do feel this way Collarbone…I accept my feelings just as they are Under the Arm…I accept my feelings and I accept that they are MY feelings Top of Head…My feelings are good and I am good
Take a deep breath and check the intensity of your original problem statement. “I shouldn’t be feeling this way.” Record your new intensity rating. This is an exercise that often sparks additional thoughts and feelings. It is quite likely that other early programming remarks made their way into your consciousness. Be sure to add them to your tapping journal for later work.
It is a new year and many people, myself included, have an intention to do something positive related to diet, exercise, or health in the new year. Unfortunately, that forward momentum lasts for only a short time. I’ve heard it is an average of only 12 days. With tapping, I think we can do a lot better than that. Ready to get started? A good place for me to start is my love-hate relationship with food.
The Setup: (karate chop point) Even though I have this love-hate relationship with food, I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway. Even thgough I love food, but I hate what it does to my body, I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway. Even though my relationship wtih food and with my body is quite problematic for me at times, I deeply and completely flove myself and accept all of these feelings.
Eyebrow…I have a love/hate relationship with food
Side of Eye…This love/hate relationship with food
Under the Eye…I hate what my love of food sometimes does to my body
Under the Nose…I love food but I hate my body
Chin…I hate food but I love my body
Collarbone…This love/hate relationship with food
Under the Arm…Even though I have this love/hate relationship with food
Top of Head…I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway
You might be thinking that this was pretty short and didn’t change anything. You would likely be correct. This is just a starting point. Think of it as the diving board where you are poised to jump/dive off. If you were really paying attention to the words they likely caused you to react in some way, whether to agree or to balk. That is where the magic of this tapping exercise can be found. Continue to tap at the points while stating aloud all of those things that popped in your head.
Check back frequently for more tapping exercises to keep you in alignment with your health goals and check out the book Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping if you want more examples so you can move forward with more confidence.
This is it, the conclusion of this series designed to help you prepare for successful weight loss when you consider make your New Year’s Resolution. Are you ready to put it all together? I know that I am
Step Five:
What is your emotional or energetic response to the following words, phrases, and statements. Rate each one on the 1-10 SUDs scale with 10 being very true or very strong.
I don’t deserve to lose weight.
Rating
It is not safe for me to lose weight
Rating
Deprivation
Rating
Failure
Rating
I’ll just regain the weight
Rating
I don’t believe I can change
Rating
Lonely
Rating
Unlovable
Rating
Sexy
Rating
Security
Rating
Expectations
Rating
It’s too late
Rating
I want them to love me for who I am, not what I look like
Rating
Sugar Addict
Rating
Cravings
Rating
Obsessions
Rating
Irritable
Rating
Anxious
Rating
Lazy
Rating
Resentment
Rating
Each of these words or statements that caused a reaction for you is a potential item that is holding you back from your weight loss success and can be addressed through tapping.
Take out your lists that you made. Follow the example above and make an intensity rating for your top reasons for losing weight, the cons of losing weight, the benefits of not losing weight, and any automatic thoughts about diet, exercise, or weight loss.
Now you are ready to do some life-changing tapping. If you are having trouble getting started, consider checking out the book Don’t Diet: Reprogram Your Weight With Meridian Tapping. It has 229 examples of tapping based on this process. You can also keep reading the blog posts as I tackle some of my own food, diet, and exercise hang-ups.
Remember the basic formula.
Make a statement that describes what needs to change.
Rate the emotional intensity associated with that statement
Repeat a setup statement or statements while tapping the karate chop point
Tap on the meridians using the tapping points while using a reminder statement
Repeat the original statement
Rate the intensity again.
Your statements don’t have to be fancy. The standard setup statement of –
“Even though (insert thought or feeling) I deeply and completely love and accept myself” –
Is a good one and works well. Then for the reminder statement just say the thought or feeling at each point or shorten it to just a few key words.
For a video demonstrating the whole tapping process click here.
