Tapping Video: Worried About What Others Will Think

Three people in meeting worried about what each other is thinkingDo you worry more about what others think than what you think? Do you let your beliefs about what others might think make your decisions for you?  Would you like to listen to your own inner guidance rather than abdicating your decisions to others? Tap along with the video to gain clarity about the problem and to start the process of change.

 

Tao Te Ching, Holy Bible, and Abraham Lincoln

Book cover of Tao Te Ching: The Definitive Edition by Lao Tzu from amazon.comI have been reading Tao Te Ching: The Definitive Edition by Lao Tzu, translated by Jonathan Star for quite a while now.  Sounds like light lunch time reading, doesn’t it?  In the introduction I was struck with the similarity between the Tao Te Ching and the Holy Bible.  Please hear me out.  The first similarity was the difficulty in preserving a knowledge base that was primarily oral.  Both the Tao Te Ching and the stories of the Holy Bible were oral traditions that were written down at a later time.  There are many similar challenges including the writer’s own biases when hearing and re-telling a story, the political and cultural influences of the time, language translation issues, and poor memory. Have you ever played telephone? By the time you get even 2-3 people deep into the retelling of a message it can often be significantly altered, not just in the details, but in the real message of the story.

The second similarity that struck me was the question of whether picture of open Biblethe story or phrase was intended to be literal or illustrative. This quandary is often evident in Bible stories and there is considerable discord between the factions that believe that everything is literal and those who believe it is a figurative lesson meant to inspire or teach.

A third similarity was that reading the verses of the Tao Te Ching elicits more questions that the answers provided. That has often been my experience when reading from the Bible. I can easily generate long lists of “but what about…?” from either book.

You may be wondering where Abraham Lincoln fits in all of this. Abraham Lincoln statueAs I was thinking about writing this post I recalled an event many years ago when my older son, then about 3 or 4, was almost inconsolable when he asked me about the man whose face was on the penny. I told him about Abraham Lincoln, and he asked me where he was. I explained that he had been killed many years ago.  My son began crying. When asked why he was crying he stated, “because I’ll never get to know him.” That is also the truth of the Tao Te Ching and the Holy Bible.  We will never really know.

As seekers of truth and wisdom we can make best guesses, sit in meditation, engage in prayer, and evaluate the cumulative knowledge of others, but we will never really know. For me it does feel sad.  So much has been lost.

Beyond the wisdom of the texts, what can I learn from this?

  • Don’t assume that others will remember my stories accurately
  • If it is important, I should write it down
  • It is my responsibility to share the stories of my “tribe”, culture, and my life. No one else can really do it.
  • If I want to know the stories and beliefs of my ancestors, I need to ask while they are still here and able to share them with me. I wait at my own peril.

Tapping Exercise: I hate situps

I really like the idea of exercise.  I feel good about myself after I do exercise.  But I don’t like ALL exercise equally.  I really hate situps (or pretty much any other core exercise).

illustration for karate chop pointStart tapping on your karate chop point and use the setup statements below.

Setup: I really hate situps. I know that working on our core is crucial to having good health.  I just can’t seem to make myself do them. Even though I really hate situps and rarely do any core strengthening exercises, I choose to love and accept myself anyway. Even though I have definitely neglected my core, I deeply and completely love and accept that part of myself that is at least trying to do what my body needs.  Even though I really hate situps, I choose to be amazed by how easy they could seem in the future.

Eyebrow…I hate situps

Side of Eye…I really hate situps

Under the Eye…They are hard for me

Nose…I know that strengthening my core muscles would be a good thing

Chin…I know that doing situps or other exercises would help me lose even more weight

Collarbone…But I have been unable to make myself do them in the past

Under the Arm…What if there is a way to actually feel good about doing them?

Top of Head…What if they don’t have to be awful?

Eyebrow…I could focus on hos good those muscles feel to actually receive some attention

Side of Eye…I could focus on how my waist measurement is changing as I am faithful with my workouts

Under the Eye…I could use my situp time to acknowledge everything that I have to be grateful for

Nose…I could use my core workouts as a time to send positive energy to situations and people who are important to me

Chin…I am open to feeling more positive about working on my core muscles

Collarbone…I am hopeful that I can feel more confident in my ability to do situps and other core exercises

Under the Arm…It really wouldn’t add that much more time to my daily workouts

Top of Head…And I am excited to think that this workout could make me feel and look even better.

Tapping Exercise: Who I Am is Constantly Changing

Black-eyed-susans with Embrace New Beginnings signSay this statement aloud, “Who I am is constantly changing.” How true does that feel to you?  Rate it on a scale of 0-10 (10=very true) and write down your number.

Begin tapping on the karate chop point and say the setup statements.

Setup: Sometimes I am confused about who I am. It seems that who I am is constantly changing. When I think I know something about myself it feels really good. When I’m uncertain about something I feel somewhat unbalanced. Accepting the changing nature of who I am is uncomfortable to me.  In spite of this discomfort, I choose to love, honor, and accept myself.

Eyebrow…Who I am is constantly changing

Side of Eye…And that is ok

Under the Eye…Who I am is constantly changing

Nose…I am open to learning to accept those changes more gracefully

Chin…Who I am is constantly changing

Collarbone…I am choosing to see that changing nature as more positive than negative

Under the Arm…Who I am is constantly changing

Top of Head…But sometimes it still makes me feel uncomfortable

Eyebrow…Who I am is constantly changing

Side of Eye…Sometimes that fills me with joy

Under the Eye…Who I am is constantly changing

Nose…Perhaps evolving would be a more comfortable word

Chin…Who I am is constantly changing

Collarbone…I choose to see the positive aspects of my changes

Under the Arm…Who I am is constantly changing

Top of Head…Expecting and accepting that change is part of the process of life

Eyebrow…Who I am is constantly changing

Side of Eye…My ideas and viewpoints change as I learn new things

Under the Eye…Who I am is constantly changing

Nose…My feelings and thoughts change as situations unfold

Chin…Who I am is constantly changing

Collarbone…I’d like to think that my wisdom is expanding

Under the Arm…Who I am is constantly changing

Top of Head…I deeply and completely love and accept myself and choose to embrace my evolution.

 

Book Review – The Wisdom of Forgiveness: Intimate Conversations and Journeys

Many of my friends and followers already know that I am intrigued by the Dalai Lama.  I was privileged to hear him speak in person once and have been very moved by most of his interviews and books.  What I have found most compelling is the apparent congruity between his teachings and his life. The Wisdom of Forgiveness: Intimate Conversations and Journeys by His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Victor Chan describes this congruence beautifully.

The Dalai Lama teaches about emptiness, interdependence, and forgiveness. He speaks specifically about forgiveness for those who have treated you cruelly or unfairly. In his case, he speaks about forgiving the Chinese people who caused his exile.

The concepts in this book are meaningful all of the time, but seem more so during our current political and social upheaval.  Whether you are Buddhist or not, check it out.

Book Review – The Journeys of Socrates

Book cover Journeys of Socrates by Dan MillmanThis book is a prequel of sorts to the Peaceful Warrior books.  I was quite excited when the book was announced and I haven’t been disappointed.  I’ve now read it multiple times.  Beyond his exceptional ability as a storyteller, Dan Millman succinctly captures the essence of our modern yearnings for lives that make sense, embrace sanity, and cultivate warriors.

The book is set in Tsarist Russia and follows the life of Sergei Ivanov from early childhood through his adult years. He is the one who is called Socrates in the other Peaceful Warrior books.  there is a blend of culture, tragedy, violence, mysticism, and martial technology that keeps the reader fully engaged no matter what their preferred genre.

More than just a novel, The Journeys of Socrates can be viewed as a parable or metaphor for living in today’s complex world. Sergei learns many lessons (most of them the hard way) and they have definite application in our current society.

One of his mentors, Serafim, was a monk. Sergei sought him out because he had previously been a great warrior and master of the martial arts. Serafim obviously believed in experiential learning, but occasionally dispensed words of great wisdom such as this, “In an instant a life may turn around; a heart may open in a moment of grace. But preparing for that moment can take a lifetime.”

The following quote is listed as being from Socrates’ Journal:

“When I was young, I believed that life might unfold in an orderly way, according to my hopes and expectations. But now I understand that the Way winds like a river, always changing, ever onward, following God’s gravity toward the Great Sea of Being. My journeys revealed that the way itself creates the warrior; that every path leads to peace, every choice to wisdom. And that life has always been, and will always be, arising in Mystery.”

For more information about Dan Millman’s work check out www.danmillman.com.

 

Tapping Video- Anxiety Part I: Sometimes your brain lies

Anxiety is a complex subject.  This video addresses the form of anxiety that is under the surface, but there isn’t necessarily a clear reason for it. The focus of the tapping is focused on reducing anxiety by small amounts without compromising the need for safety that anxiety actually seems to provide.

Tapping Exercise – I Just Ate 3 Brownies: I’m such a failure

Have you ever eaten something you had decided you weren’t yummy chocolate brownie with chocolate drizzlegoing to eat or eaten more of them than you had intended?  Sadly, it happens to me more frequently than I would like.  What usually happens next is the thought “I might as well eat whatever I want because I already blew it.”  The tapping exercise below is a good way to help minimize the damage. These words will work for you, even if what you ate or when you ate it is slightly different.  Or, you can substitute your own words.

Say this statement and rate the intensity or how true it feels to you on a 0-10 scale (10=very true).  “I’m such a failure.”  Now say this one and rate it “I already blew it.”  Write down your numbers.

Tap on your karate chop point and use the setup statements.  Even though I just ate 3 brownies, and they definitely weren’t on my food plan for this afternoon, I choose to love and accept myself anyway.  Even though I ate 3 brownies while waiting for my lunch to cook, I choose to love and accept myself anyway.  Even though I feel like a failure since I ate those brownies, I choose to love and accept myself anyway.

Eyebrow…I just ate 3 brownies

Side of Eye…I can’t believe it

Under the Eye…I had been doing so well

Nose…This seems like a huge setback

Chin…Its not like I was really hungry

Collarbone…I am actually cooking lunch right now

Under the Arm…I’m nervous that it won’t be good

Top of Head…I’ve made two dishes that I’ve never made before

Eyebrow…That always makes me anxious

Side of Eye…But I’m also excited to see what happens

Under the Eye…I know that I often eat when I am nervous

Nose…But I’ve already blown my food plan

Chin…So I might as well eat whatever I want

Collarbone…There’s no point in controlling my food now

Under the Arm…I’ve already pointed the finger of guilt my way

Top of Head…I’m already wallowing in blame

Eyebrow…So I might as well eat.

Side of Eye…I already blew it

Under the Eye…I already ate something that is on my forbidden list

Nose…I ate way too much of it too

Chin…I might as well go ahead and eat whatever I want

Collarbone…That’s what quitters to

Under the Arm…I’m a guilty and shameful quitter

Top of Head…Ouch! That hurts!

Eyebrow…Sometimes I do give up

Side of Eye…Sometimes I don’t

Under the Eye…I don’t have to give up just because I made a mistake

Nose…I have options

Chin…I have choices

Collarbone…I already blew it might not be totally accurate

Under the Arm…I wouldn’t tell anyone else to give up just because of a simple error

Top of Head…I’m not going to tell myself that right now either

Eyebrow…I can start back on my food plan whenever I choose

Side of Eye…Including now

Under the Eye…This is just a setback

Nose…I can get back on track right now

Chin…In fact,, I am back on track right now

Collarbone…And I can stay back on track if I choose to

Under the Arm…I’ve been back on track for several minutes now

Top of Head…I am feeling better already.

 

Take a deep breath and let it out gently.  Say your original statements again and rate them.  Notice any shift you may have made.  If the intensity is still higher than a 3 or 4, keep tapping with the above examples or better yet, use your own words.  For many people there will be a shift to a slightly different thought, feeling or belief.  Feel free to continue tapping on the new thought or write it down for later work.

Happy Tapping!